Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

NDSM werf, somewhere around januari 2014. (made with my Olympus AF-10 and I think it was an agfaphoto filmroll)
NDSM werf, somewhere around januari 2014. (made with my Olympus AF-10 and I think it was an agfaphoto filmroll)

When I think back to how this year started, and how it is now, I get a little overwhelmed and panicky. As I think is the case for most people, it’s incredible to think about how quickly your life can change. And the scary part is, you don’t even really realise it’s happened. Not until you take a moment to look back.

I’m not doing very well, which has given me plenty of moments to look back. And my dear stars, has it changed. I feel like my whole outlook on my life has done a complete 180. Especially when it comes to my illness. I am so much more accepting of my disabilities, it’s incredible. I won’t say I don’t still hate it, that I can’t do all the things I want to do, but I am more at peace with it at the same time.
I still have trouble pacing my activities, I still tend to do much more than I should. But I am doing less than I did before, and I am getting better and better at realising when I am taking my body a step too far. Which doesn’t always stop me, but hey, at least I noticed it in time, AMIRIGHT?!

Apart from that, there are also other changes going on in my life. Saying goodbye at my old job, not working for a few weeks, starting a new job. Which are some pretty major and weird and aaaahhh-freaking-out-now changes. But also a new pink haircolour, a kitty proof balcony so we can all three hang out in the sun together, some new people, some old people, some new old people etc, etc. Some of the changes are freaking me out, some of the changes are making me sad, some of the changes are making me (very) happy, and some of the changes are making me both sad and happy at the same time.
Which is probably how it all should be, cause that’s just life I guess. But just, weird, you know, life?
But good weird. Definitely good weird.

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